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puppetsexualbrotherfucka:

hist0ryisribbeting:

where is everyone

hello??

is everyone alive

do i need to arrange a corpse party for you all

i mean funeral

sorry

people tend to get unsettled when i say corpse party

i dont know why

i mean its not necessarily a bad thing

anyways

where did everyone go?

Sup little lady. Shit’s been pretty quiet lately. What did you say about a party?

I WAS GOING TO SAY FUCK PARTIES.

BUT AS LONG AS DAVE ISN’T THE HOST I BELIEVE I WON’T BE ENDANGERED OF BEING FORCED INTO HUMILIATING AND UNDESERVING, MINDBLOWINGLY LAME DANCES.

TOO BAD I’M STILL ALIVE.

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discjockeyswag:

PUPPETS

AWESOME

THATS ALL THERE IS TO SAY ON THE MATTER

WHAT THE FUCK.

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discjockeyswag said: 0-50

WOW THE APPLES DIDN’T FALL FAR FROM THE TREE HUH.
AND APPARENTLY LANDED ON TOP OF EACH OTHER.

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puppetsexualbrotherfucka said: 0-50, asshole.

0. kissed a different race other than myself
PROBABLY? I DON’T KNOW. I THINK DAVE IS PROBABLY SOME HODGE PODGE OF BLOODLINES FROM DIFFERENT EUROPEAN ANCESTRY. AND I MEAN, WHO REALLY KNOWS. I GUESS I NEVER REALLY THOUGHT ABOUT MYSELF, EITHER.
I’VE NEVER KISSED ASIANS OR AFRICAN AMERICANS, NOR NATIVE AMERICANS OR ACTUAL INDIANS.
EVERYONE IS AMERICAN. THE END.

1. kissed a girl
MAYBE. SHE BIT ME AND CACKLED, LIKE ‘HEHEHEHEHE’. WHAT THE FUCK.

2. kissed a boy
SO MANY FUCKING TIMES.

3. kissed in the rain
ACTUALLY THAT SOUNDS EXTREMELY FUCKING UNPLEASANT. COLD AND WET AND MUDDY.

4. kissed on a ferris wheel
NO.

5. kissed underwater
NOT THIS EITHER.
WE NEED TO GET MORE CREATIVE I GUESS.

6. kissed on new years
NO.

7. kissed under the mistletoe
NO. I DON’T KISS UNDER PARASITES.

8. kissed on 11:11
WHAT FUCKING LOSER WOULD DO THAT?

9. failed my drivers test
SO MANY FUCKING TIMES.
SCREW PARALLEL PARKING.

10. showered with someone else
WHAT, NO.

11. made someone cry
HAHAHAH.

12. broke someone’s heart
I DON’T THINK SO WAIT NO I GUESS MAYBE I DON’T KNOW.
I KNOW MY DADS HAVE BROKEN PEOPLE’S HEART. MAYBE LITERALLY.

13. rejected someone
YES. SORT OF?

14. gotten rejected
HI EGBERT.

15. gone skinnydipping
EW FUCK NO.

16. wished on a shooting star
MAYBE.

17. wished at 11:11
OKAY MAYBE.

18. wished on a eyelash
I CAN’T EVEN SEE MY EYELASHES.

19. wished on birthday candles
IT’D BE SAD IF I HADN’T.

20. had a wish come true
I HAD SOME PRETTY STUPID WISHES.

21. stayed up for more than 24 hours
AUGH.

22. had a sleepover with the opposite sex
NO.

23. slept in the same bed as the opposite sex
NO.

24. had a date to a dance
DON’T EVEN MENTION DANCES.

25. had a one night stand
NOT REALLY MY THING.

26. had my heart broken
WASN’T HIS FAULT.

27. made fun of someone forbeingfat
YOU’RE FAT, STRIDER.

28. cut myself
I’M TOO MUCH OF A COWARD.
I TRIED AND FREAKED OUT.

29. liked more than one person at the same time
YES.

30. kissed more than two people in one night
NO? IT WASN’T LIP TO LIP I DON’T THINK.

31. found something valuable on the ground
TWENTY DOLLARS.

32. been bitch slapped
LEFT THE BIGGEST BRUISE.

33. been slapped
I HAVE PANSY SKIN.

34. been told i’m ugly
MY REFLECTION ENDURES CONSTANT ABUSE.

35. been told i’m worthless
MY REFLECTION IS A SAD, PATHETIC WORM.

36. slapped someone
SCREW SLAPPING. I’LL PUNCH.

37. talked to someone via webcam
YES.

38. had a virus on my computer
I AM THE MOTHER OF COMPUTER VIRUSES.

39. had my butt slapped by someone i don’t know
THEY LOST A FINGER.
NO REALLY, MY DADS ARE CRAZY FUCKS.

40. kissed someone i don’t know
NO.

41. have a pillow pet
NO!

42. said something i wish i could take back
ALL THE FUCKING TIME. FUCK.

43. broken up with someone
YES.

44. lost a friend
NOT YET, SOMEHOW.

45. had a fight with someone over a guy
NO.
WHAT ABOUT GIRLS? SEXIST.

46. cheated on someone
NO.

47. someone cheated on someone, with me
SORT OF BUT I APPROVED IT MAYBE KIND OF?
IT’S COMPLICATED.

48. sexted
THEORETICALLY. FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES.

49. gotten bullied via text/internet/calls
I CAN SAY IT DIDN’T LAST LONG.

50. fell in love
FUCK ME.

Link

lesbiannextdoor:

0. kissed a different race other than myself

1. kissed a girl

2. kissed a boy

3. kissed in the rain

4. kissed on a ferris wheel

5. kissed underwater

6. kissed on new years 

7. kissed under the mistletoe

8. kissed on 11:11

9. failed my drivers test

10. showered with someone else

11. made someone cry

12. broke someone’s heart

13. rejected someone

14. gotten rejected

15. gone skinny dipping

16. wished on a shooting star

17. wished at 11:11

18. wished on a eyelash

19. wished on birthday candles

20. had a wish come true

21. stayed up for more than 24 hours

22. had a sleepover with the opposite sex

23. slept in the same bed as the opposite sex

24. had a date to a dance

25. had a one night stand

26. had my heart broken

27. made fun of someone for being fat

28. cut myself

29. liked more than one person at the same time

30. kissed more than two people in one night

31. found something valuable on the ground

32. been bitch slapped

33. been slapped

34. been told i’m ugly

35. been told i’m worthless

36. slapped someone

37. talked to someone via webcam

38. had a virus on my computer

39. had my butt slapped by someone i don’t know

40. kissed someone i don’t know

41. have a pillow pet

42. said something i wish i could take back

43. broken up with someone

44. lost a friend

45. had a fight with someone over a guy

46. cheated on someone

47. someone cheated on someone, with me

48. sexted

49. gotten bullied via text/internet/calls

50. fell in love

(Source: cuh-rista, via prevailingjesterlies)

Video

((Every Avenue - Hit Me Where It Hurts the Most))

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((excuse me guys while I post music

Sum 41 - Jessica Kill))

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kii22iing day?

discjockeyswag:

prevailingjesterlies:

karkinoscarcinoma:

volatileduality:

that ii2 the 2tupiide2t thiing, hone2tly B| doe2 no one have anythiing better two do?

HOLY SHIT MACKERELS ON A PIKE.

THIS WAS FUCKING EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING NOT MORE THAN A MINUSCULE FUCKING MOMENT AGO.

aww, come on guys!

it’s just harmless fun.

:B

no need to be jerky mcjerk jerks.

i bet you guys just want kisses but don’t wanna aaaask! heheheh.

i think johns right guys

youre just too shy to ask for some little kisses

IF I WANT KISSES I’LL FUCKING TAKE THEM THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

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kii22iing day?

volatileduality:

karkinoscarcinoma:

volatileduality:

that ii2 the 2tupiide2t thiing, hone2tly B| doe2 no one have anythiing better two do?

HOLY SHIT MACKERELS ON A PIKE.

THIS WAS FUCKING EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING NOT MORE THAN A MINUSCULE FUCKING MOMENT AGO.

……………..ii’m un2ure of whether two congratulate you for thiinkiing or warn you agaiin2t doiing iit iin the future

don’t hurt your2elf

GO FUCK YOURSELF ON A FLAGPOLE, CAPTOR.